Profiles in Courage

(This has no real bearing on the essence of this post, I guess, but it was 100 years ago today that Joan of Arc was beatified in Rome.)

Regular readers of this blog are familiar with my recent entrée into the world of Facebook, where I have re–connected with many old friends.

Some of my friends have not signed up with Facebook, for a variety of reasons.

I have one friend, for example, who resists it because of his concerns about privacy on the internet. That's a legitimate concern, and I haven't pressed him to reverse his personal policy.

I have another friend — actually, she was my girlfriend when I was a senior in high school — who might benefit in many ways from signing up with Facebook — but her teenaged children apparently commandeer the family computer so frequently that she rarely has the opportunity to read my e–mails (which, I admit, are not as frequent as they should be — but that is certainly not a reflection on my regard for her).

Since I expect to refer to her again in this post, I will say, simply, that her name is Karen.

Now, the last thing I want is to be a shill for Facebook, but I recently became aware of something that I hope will prompt Karen to join up with it.

Karen, you see, is a breast cancer survivor. She told me about her condition a few years ago. I was saddened to hear about it, but I have been encouraged by her reports on her treatment. From what she has told me, the cancer was caught in its early stages and her treatments have done the job.

That is no guarantee, of course. There have been many cases of cancer that was thought to be in remission but returned to finish the job.

This is where Facebook comes in. I was recently made aware that Facebook is the host of a blog by actress Marcia Strassman, who has Stage IV breast cancer. Essentially, what that means is that the cancer has spread to her bones. The medical term for that is "metastasis."

Hers may not be a household name, but you would recognize her if you saw her. In the 1970s, she had a role on the TV series "M*A*S*H" in its early days, then she went on to be Julie Kotter, Gabe Kaplan's wife in the series "Welcome Back, Kotter." In the 1980s, she was Rick Moranis' wife in the surprise Disney hit, "Honey, I Shrunk the Kids."

She was diagnosed with breast cancer in March 2007, and she discussed her experience with GoodNewsBroadcast. You can watch the YouTube clip of the interview, but I warn you in advance that the sound quality is really poor. Basically, she and her gynecologist found it hard to believe that she could have breast cancer because she had passed a mammogram with flying colors only a few months before. But, lo and behold, after undergoing more tests, she did have breast cancer, and she embarked on a treatment regimen.

I tried to find her blog outside of Facebook because I wanted to pass it on to Karen, but I couldn't find it. I'm not sure what Strassman's condition is these days, but I know she has been involved in several health–related causes, and even though the audio on the YouTube clip is not especially good, I could tell that she has the kind of approach to her disease that can inspire others.

No one is ever truly out of the woods as far as cancer is concerned, I suppose. I hope Karen's cancer has been vanquished, but it may well return. If it does, she may benefit from Strassman's blog. But, if Karen doesn't sign up with Facebook, I've found many blogs that are being written by people who are living with breast cancer. And their insights may help her.

Unfortunately, it's too late for blogs to help another friend of mine.

Her name was Jane, and I met her and her future husband, Mike, when we were all students at the University of Arkansas. Mike and Jane got married a few years later and then moved to the West Coast. Their marriage ended in the mid–1990s.

Once again, Facebook enters the picture. Mike and I lost touch over the years, but I heard from mutual friends that Jane died of skin cancer a few years ago, although they weren't able to provide any details.

Anyway, Mike and I recently got back in touch through Facebook, and one of the things I asked him about right away was Jane. He didn't know many details — he remarried and fathered two sons in the years before Jane's death — but he shared with me what he knew. Apparently, she followed her dreams and was completing her Ph.D. thesis in her anthropological studies when she was diagnosed. The cancer did its damage quickly, and she died a little more than five years ago, on March 28, 2004 — the same day actor Peter Ustinov died.

Mike shared an article about Jane with me. The author concluded it by saying that Jane's life was "too short but well lived."

I could spend a lot of time and space writing about the influence both Karen and Jane had on my life. But, like other people I have known who were afflicted with cancer, their greatest influence was by example.

I don't know what the circumstances of my own death will be. Most of the time, I hope it will be quick and relatively painless. But if it turns out that I am one of those who must linger with a terminal illness, I hope I will be guided by the inspirational memories of my courageous friends.