The Hiding Place

In the last week, a 33–year–old woman named Sandra Sanborn was arrested by Quincy, Mass., police. She confessed that she hid 19 bags of crack cocaine in her bra.

I just have a couple of thoughts on this.

First, it seems to me that a woman's bra is a pretty good hiding place if what you're trying to hide is small and flat, like paper money or a credit card. But 19 bags of anything that is bulky needs to be concealed elsewhere, if only because ...

Nineteen bags of just about anything stuffed in a bra will give the impression that the woman's breasts are larger than they really are. And, if you're a woman and you're trying to smuggle 19 bags of crack cocaine past the authorities, do you really want to hide them in a spot that is sure to attract attention?

Now, speaking only for myself, when I meet a woman, I try to look her in the eyes the whole time. I try not to allow my eyes to go below her shoulders.

But I know there are some guys out there who set their sights lower — in some cases, quite a bit lower.

In my experience, you can't tell which guys are which until you begin talking with them. And then it is too late.

So my advice to any would–be crack cocaine smugglers is simple: Don't use your bra to conceal the substance.

Pick some place that is inconspicuous.

Seems like a no–brainer to me.

Unfortunately, that seems to be what she has — no brain.